Change can be frightening especially when the past has been filled with deep and rewarding experiences. However, change happens at all different stages and areas of life – study, work and in all political, social and organizational realities. We may find it especially difficult if we have had a role of responsibility that we do not want to lose.

We would like certain experiences to continue forever. But this is not reality. Remaining lost in “true and beautiful experiences” does not make us live life now, because life itself is change and that is the dynamic that makes it fascinating even when it is difficult and painful.

This was well explained by Dame Cicely Saunders, founder of the first modern hospice. She was an extraordinary woman who as a nurse, social worker and physician “invented” a new way of caring for people during the most difficult periods of their lives. According to her, real experience depends on depth rather than duration. “The hours of real relationships seem to pass in a moment, while the boring days seem to last forever. But years later, the genuine times remain forever imprinted in our hearts whereas the meaningless days fade into nothing.” (1)

Sometimes, there is a sense of awe and excitement in realising that these “true and genuine” moments – even when they are filled with pain and darkness – can be transformed into opportunities for peace and light. During times of passage in life, deep relationships with others can give us the strength to face the difficulties, trials, sufferings and stress we encounter on the way. They encourage us to start anew without fear and boldly face what lies ahead. They enable us to reach out to others and embrace the pains of humanity around us: they even enable us to bring the light and peace we know to others who do not experience it.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer said, “Time lost is when we have not loved and lived a fully human life.”(2)

What happens when these true experiences finish and seem to disappear? Does this take away the value of the experience at its very roots? Absolutely not! Memory has a great worth of its own and is the very foundation of human progress. Moreover, as philosopher, George Santayana, says, “Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”

People before us have given their lives for our freedom and happiness. We need to return to the experiences that lie at the foundation of our personal lives and the groups to which we belong in order to have the strength to always begin again, even in times of doubt, fragility and weariness.

1. Cicely Saunders. Templeton Prize 1981
2. Dietrich Bonhoeffer. “Resistance and Surrender” Letters and Other Writings from Prison

Phot by Sasin Tipchai – Pixabay

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L’IDEA DEL MESE è attualmente prodotta dal “Centro del Dialogo con persone di convinzioni non religiose” del Movimento dei Focolari. Si tratta di un’iniziativa nata nel 2014 in Uruguay per condividere con gli amici non credenti i valori della Parola di Vita, cioè la frase della Scrittura che i membri del Movimento si impegnano a mettere in atto nella vita quotidiana. Attualmente L’IDEA DEL MESE viene tradotta in 12 lingue e distribuita in più di 25 paesi, con adattamenti del testo alle diverse sensibilità culturali. www. dialogue4unity.dev.focolare.org¹